- The best thing about a boolean is even if you are wrong, you are only off by a bit. (Anonymous)
- Without requirements or design, programming is the art of adding bugs to an empty text file. (Louis Srygley)
- Before software can be reusable, it first has to be usable. (Ralph Johnson)
- The best method for accelerating a computer is the one that boosts it by 9.8 m/s2. (Anonymous)
- I think Microsoft named .Net so it wouldn’t show up in a Unix directory listing. (Oktal)
- If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along wound destroy civilization. (Gerald Weinberg)
- There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works. (Alan J. Perlis)
- Deleted code is debugged code. (Jeff Sickel)
- Walking on water and developing software from a specification are easy if both are frozen. (Edward V Berard)
- If debugging is the process of removing software bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in. (Edsger Dijkstra)
- Software undergoes beta testing shortly before it’s released. Beta is Latin for “still doesn’t work. (Anonymous)
- Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning. (Rick Cook)
- It’s a curious thing about our industry: not only do we not learn from our mistakes, we also don’t learn from our successes. (Keith Braithwaite)
- There are only two kinds of programming languages: those people always bitch about and those nobody uses. (Bjarne Stroustrup)
- In order to understand recursion, one must first understand recursion. (Anonymous)
- The cheapest, fastest, and most reliable components are those that aren’t there. (Gordon Bell)
- The best performance improvement is the transition from the nonworking state to the working state. (J. Osterhout)
- The trouble with programmers is that you can never tell what a programmer is doing until it’s too late. (Seymour Cray)
- Don’t worry if it doesn’t work right. If everything did, you’d be out of a job. (Mosher’s Law of Software Engineering)
- Ready, fire, aim the fast approach to software development. Ready, aim, aim, aim, aim: the slow approach to software development. (Anonymous)
- It’s not a bug – it’s an undocumented feature. (Anonymous)
- One man’s crappy software is another man’s full-time job. (Jessica Gaston)
- A good programmer is someone who always looks both ways before crossing a one-way street. (Doug Linder)
- Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live. (Martin Golding
- Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life. (Michael Sinz)
- “There are 2 hard problems in computer science: caching, naming, and off-by-1 errors”
- If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
